I have discovered the beautiful force of silence. Silence is at the very core of listening. When I listen to a friend voice concerns and troubles, my silence communicates comfort, patience and understanding. Theologian Paul Tillich writes:
“The first duty of love is to listen.”
If I were to fill the silence with my own advice or opinion, I may come across as a know-it-all who thinks more of himself than caring for others. I can understand why James, in his letter to the early church, states:
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. —James 1:19-20, NIV
Each day we have many opportunities to listen. When we listen to each other, we make ourselves present and available to our friends who simply need to be heard. When we listen, we bring honor to the moment. Listening may be inconvenient and time consuming, but if we really care for each other, we will be willing to make that sacrifice.
The sought-after management consultant Margaret J. Wheatley understands the importance of listening. Take note of what she has to say:
“Listening is such a simple act. It requires us to be present, and that takes practice, but we don’t have to do anything else. We don’t have to advise, or coach, or sound wise. We just have to be willing to sit there and listen.”
Listening is all about building trusted friendships. Of course, there is a time to speak, especially if you know your words will restore and rescue your friends from poor decisions. But your words will have greater meaning if you have listened patiently first. There is wisdom in silence. Winston Churchill had something to say about this:
“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.”
Campus Pastor Lane Skoglund-Anderson serves at Mainstreet Village in Richfield, Minn.
The Light for the Way series provides staff with an examination of a biblical reading to deepen our focus on scripture. Thank you for engaging with this series as we seek wisdom through prayer and reflection as a Christian ministry.
